Before mobile phones and email addresses, Jeremiah and I agreed that if we could keep in contact for 10 years we would be friends for life.
On our 10th anniversary we reminisced about:
- Letter writing and a friendship that spanned continents and lots of different addresses.
- Sharing and learning from each others relationship highs and heartbreaking lows.
- The dream I had of Jeremiah hurting his legs the night he fell down the stairs.
- Meeting his German wife, in India...and the day I was 'best man' at their wedding in Australia.
- Camping and home-brews. Old cars and sweet sweet music. Sharing our journals and philosophies.
- This song: Everybody's Talkin' Harry Nillson.
On our twentieth anniversary we reminisced about:
- The baptism of their first child, my God daughter.
- The day I drove away from a painful relationship and how he just happened to be driving down the same road. That perfectly timed hug.
- The trials and triumphs of commitment and love.
- Introducing him to the Captain.
- More children
- Family holidays at the lake house. Euro Disney in Paris and the day our families sailed the most beautiful fjord in Denmark together.
- The trials and triumphs of commitment and love.
- Introducing him to the Captain.
- More children
- Family holidays at the lake house. Euro Disney in Paris and the day our families sailed the most beautiful fjord in Denmark together.
- Our toast to remembering the past and making new memories.
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I'm happy to share Jeremiah with his wife... but I get jealous when the Captain gets to spend more time with him than I do... Jokes jokes - honestly I prefer the 'in vino veritas' chats with his wife, to catching fish with either of the men folk.
He's a dedicated parent and a devoted partner...it's no secret how much I love him, them, all of us.
The last time we met he said "Our friendship feels like putting on your most comfortable pair of boots or slippers." Then he put another log on the fire, we poured four more glasses of spiced rum and started making plans for our next family holiday... Germany here we come.
On platonic relationships - do you believe men and women can truly be friends? How would you feel if your partners best friend was the opposite sex?
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I'm happy to share Jeremiah with his wife... but I get jealous when the Captain gets to spend more time with him than I do... Jokes jokes - honestly I prefer the 'in vino veritas' chats with his wife, to catching fish with either of the men folk.
He's a dedicated parent and a devoted partner...it's no secret how much I love him, them, all of us.
The last time we met he said "Our friendship feels like putting on your most comfortable pair of boots or slippers." Then he put another log on the fire, we poured four more glasses of spiced rum and started making plans for our next family holiday... Germany here we come.
On platonic relationships - do you believe men and women can truly be friends? How would you feel if your partners best friend was the opposite sex?
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Seriously I can't name him Jeremiah and not post this song. Starts singing *Jeremiah was a bullfrog*
He will be disappointed it's not "I am a hotdog" by Mabel
He will be disappointed it's not "I am a hotdog" by Mabel
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The A to Z challenge. My theme and links to all 26 Greatest loves of my life.
Love the way he spoke about friendship like the most comfortable pair of boots or slippers.
ReplyDeleteit describes us perfectly...
DeleteFriends like that should be cherished. Love and laughter, comfort and hot spiced rum... It doesn't get much better than that.
ReplyDeletehmmm heating up the rum sounds like a good idea - we cherish each other, but we never send christmas cards or birthday presents - it's time together we cherish
DeleteAnybody can be friends if they nurture the relationship.
ReplyDeleteM. J. Joachim
A to Z Challenge Co-Host
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Too true M.J - but i really do think that some people are more capable of platonic relationships then others...
DeleteI can't click on that song! I'll never get the earworm out of my head if I do!
ReplyDeleteJeremiah sounds like good people.
definitely good people - that ear worm has been in my head just saying the name jeremiah - but I never get tired of hearing Nillson though
DeleteFriends like that are rare.
ReplyDeleteIda, I have just read the profile at the top of the page here fully for the first time. (I thought you were still in Australia at first glance a day or two ago. That's a brilliant little abstract you've written about your life.)
The blog is great. Best to you.
Hi Scribbler, thanks - I've tweaked it a lot, I changed a sentence yesterday so am glad to hear your positive feedback. I live in Denmark for now but have my heart (and a home) in both places so I feel comfortable saying I live in Australia too... :)
DeleteThanks for visiting my blog. I read your "About Me" an instantaneously knew I would love your blog :) Never been to Denmark, lived in Norway for a brief period. I've heard of the similarities amongst the two. Still didn't get the chance to sail through a fjord though :)
ReplyDeleteThanks Tobago woman, Norwegian and Danish are practically the same language, but it's much more expensive and colder up there - and the fjords are much more impressive then they are here too. I've found both cultures to be sophisticated and fun.
DeleteIt's good The Captain and Jeremiah get along :) Sounds like a really great friendship that all four of you can share. yes I believe men and women can truly be friends - I studied computer systems engineering at uni and I was surrounded by men - some of those guys are still good friends.
ReplyDeleteSophie
Sophie's Thoughts & Fumbles - A to Z Ghosts
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It is good, all my ex boyfriends have got along with him.. I think there's nothing to fear when the respect for each other is so obvious.
DeleteTruly a lovely post. I know someone said so above, but I want to reiterate how lucky you are that the Captain is such an easy going guy! It's funny, growing up I always had more guy friends than girl and this continues to be the case although now my friendships don't last long because my husband is seen as 'too intimidating.' He honestly doesn't mean to be but he's the oldest brother of three and was in the Marine Corps so he's kind of an alpha male and is just naturally kinda dominant. *Sigh.*
ReplyDeleteNever the less, my Aussie bestie whom I love like a little brother and haven't seen (or heard much from) in two years is coming to stay with us in November! I'm so excited. I speak to his parents more than my own and love his family to the moon and back, so I guess I'll have to give the hubs a little talk....
Thanks Lena, The Captain is easy going and kind of Alpha male with three brothers too... not in the marines but a sailor nevertheless. And my bestie is an Aussie too... and we can go long periods of time without hearing too much from each other - this just gets more interesting by the sentence.... You have a clear perspective by the sounds of it :) I hope your talk goes smoothly - I suggest showing him this post ;)
DeleteNice to have such a friendship. I had a BFF for 30 some years and then she decided she didn't want to be around me any more.
ReplyDeleteI've had a couple of friends that have done that over the years - and a couple that came back and admitted the problem was theirs. Losing a friend can be worse than losing a partner sometimes.
DeleteLovely story, and I agree, opposite sex friendships are fine. I tend to get on more with men, but maybe that is because I have five brothers.
ReplyDeleteDropping by on the A to Z. :)
I imagine having 5 brothers would make you an expert on the male species.. I grew up with sisters, but seem to have worked in male dominated industries a lot.
DeleteI used to have a friend like that and hoped we would be friends for life but his significant other didn't like the idea. Makes me sad thinking about what could have been!
ReplyDeleteI am eternally grateful that his wife was so open hearted and accepting to the point where even discussing the ins and outs of our friendship seemed immature to say the least - it just is what it is and there has never been a need to question it... I thought I would have to make her feel comfortable - she in fact made it easy for me. I think if it had have been any different I would have blamed him more than her.
DeleteIda you are truly blessed to have this friendship, and to have been so conscious of how special it was during all those years. May you all have many more years of warm-hearted sharing and loving time together. Great songs, too :-)
ReplyDeleteDon't I know it... but I also expected it to be no different. I think we were conscious of the value of friendship from the first conversation we ever had...
DeleteLovely real life story Ida thank you for sharing it with us. So great that The Captain and Jeremiah are good friends too ... when you can wear them like old socks or boots that says much. Yes, I do think men and women can be best friends but - sometimes the significant other doesn't care for sharing of souls ... and MAYBE they have a point? I don't know ...
ReplyDeleteGarden of Eden Blog
Sadly - you are right? It is precisely because of those people that cause the 'maybe' that I think our story is important to share. I know The Captain loved the old boots and slippers analogy too.
DeleteI think it takes maturity with both sexes in question to have a platonic relationship. It's easy to just shift to the sexual attraction and flirt - and I mean - easy as in the immaturity aspect. I think it takes a sense of personal respect to have a friendship with the opposite sex that's purely platonic.
ReplyDeleteI'm coming over for spiced rum (my favorite!)
Well said Cristina...in the grand scheme of things there are so few people I have been sexually attracted to - I can't understand why anyone would question an asexual relationship. I guess that is a form of maturity on some level... I can't drink rum if it isn't spiced... thanks from sharing your thoughts.
DeleteRead this before I went to sleep last night, my best friend is male (I'm female) and over the years people still sometimes struggle to understand our relationship.
ReplyDeleteWe've been best mates now for 20 years and been through a lot, his partner died a few years back (only in their early 40's at the time), I think "love him so hard as a brother" is the best way to describe it, but I can't imagine my life without him. When I got married he was my "best man" at our wedding... although my Grandmother joked he really should be in a dress!
The spiced rum also gets my vote!
Mars
Curling Stones for Lego People
Hi Mars, once again thank you for sharing a part of you here. I came so close to writing 'love of a brother', but we have have never hurt each other like family members sometimes can - I think this type of platonic relationship, in many ways, is more sacred than the relationships we have with family or even lovers. When we were younger a few of his mates thought we were secretly together, some of my friends just expected that we would eventually get together. Dogs and cats can be best friends and never consider breeding was the way I tried to explain it sometimes. How awful, for your friend to lose his wife, and what a wonderful sense of humour your grandmother has. All the best for the next 20 years... (and beyond)
DeleteLove the bond that your share not only with Jeremiah but his family too! Friends like Jeremiah must be truly cherished. ♥
ReplyDeleteI cherish the relationship with his family, his sister was the first person I rang after my awful dream. His 3rd child hugged me for the first time only after she saw me and her grandfather give each other a big hug... Good people are easy to love. Thanks Shilpa
DeleteBeautifully told tale and heart warming. Life is all about cherishing all relationships that cement our bond in this journey of life. Aren't all of us travelers in this journey? Yeah! I believe that men and women can be friends and there is more than intimacy between men and women. People who think that men and women can't be friends have not made friends in their lives.
ReplyDeleteThanks Vishal. I have often used the term traveller to describe my love life, and I couldn't agree with you more.
DeleteClose platonic friendships with the opposite sex...I have a few of those and in my younger years, I wondered if it was because they were only "partially attracted" to me (because I was one of those When Harry Met Sally avid fans) but now I'm just grateful for their perspectives.
ReplyDeleteI've had a few coulda, woulda, shoulda, relationships in my younger years too...My interpretation of platonic is more asexual, as in much the same way you wouldn't be attracted to your same sex best friend, if you were both non curious heterosexuals. I loved When Harry met Sally, and My best friends wedding, neither of them stayed true platonic. I guess platonic has a lot of different categories.
DeleteWhat I shoulda said was having the perspective of the other side is valuable and healing.
DeleteWhat a great friendship. Thanks for sharing a glimpse of that with all of us!
ReplyDeleteYour welcome Chuck.
Delete