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Amongst other things, this is a love story.... the theme changes occasionally... this year it is fitness and learning to love yourself.

27 September 2010

A timely reminder. Coincidence, luck and miracles.

Writing my thoughts comes naturally to me, so does sitting on the sofa and doing nothing at all, it's all to easy for me to get distracted by my thoughts. I almost forgot about this blog.  This time I received a reminder from Kevin Kunz, find his blog here, a leading authority in reflexology, for more info here's a wikipedia link.  Kevin also has a very interactive facebook page, and his latest status about how 'all reflexolgists should become writers or risk their experiences being lost forever', provided me with some much needed inspiration. Call it coincidence, synchronicity, miracle messages or luck, but just as I was filing enthusiasm for my newly created blog to a blind corner of my brain, he posted that status update.

I thanked him, then upon reflection, realised once again, that most of my experiences are in fact a collection of co-incidences. Including recently one of my new friends in Denmark knowing a woman, who is about to open a new massage clinic, 5 minutes from my home, and just happens to be looking for a reflexologist.

Reflexology is quite popular in Denmark, my Søren even recalls his mother taking him to one when he was a child, over 30 years ago.  My decision to move here was made even easier knowing that my speciality is somewhat understood here.  In Melbourne I had struggled with the idea of where to set up business, again my sense of never really knowing where I belonged took over, so I preferred to do home visits, saw a few clients in my own home and also the few different clinics where I worked, as either a nurse or colon hydrotherapist.  I would often meditate or ponder the question of where to set up, and would only ever get the vague response that I should head North. Well Denmark is about as for North on the planet as you can get from Melbourne, and it still amuses me that I never guessed this far North was the answer.

I started reflexology in my late 20's, at a time when my stress levels were affecting my mental health, grounding myself and learning how to relax was a neccesity and became my number one priority.  I, like so many other people, once hated my feet with a passion, but working the feet seemed as logical a place as any to start the process of grounding and a much needed change because my head, heart (and hormones) were too messed up. As I was searching for the right course I co-incidently found a course for a hospital based nursing traineeship, that also paid me to study. So I studied nursing and reflexology at the same time and discovered that neither would have made much sense to me, if I had not balanced what I refer to as, health and healing, the science and art of medicine and wellbeing.  

Even though there is plenty of valid research, there is also a lot of skepticism about reflexology. I guess it makes no sense to some people that everything is connected.  A lot of what we do is felt, and it is not so easy to describe a feeling, but with a bit of practice it is a skill that anyone can learn to do. There is relatively little scientific evidence that supports the reflexes on the feet, however fMRI scans have proved that working an area of the foot activates the part of the brain that corresponds with the specific part of the body related to that reflex, fMRI test results. Simarlarily, Father Josef, another leading reflexologists, discusses in his courses the chinese autopsies that have also revealed a hardening of specific reflexes related to illnesses people have died from. Perhaps for some, everytime a reflexologist pin points a significant ailment or emotion, through the feet, can be described as miracle or coincidence, but the accuracy of these so called coincidences is a science in itself.  Like the time I could only feel one kidney reflex on a client and discovered later that she had her kidney removed some 50 years earlier, to name just one example.

Coincidences, luck and miracles really are the same thing.  Meeting someone at the right time is  both a co-incidence and a miracle. We can brush these situations aside and realise nothing or embrace them as opportunites to learn from ourselves, the people around us, and perhaps even make a difference to the lives of many.  

19 September 2010

Inspired by a friend and her painting

Here are the messages that inspired continuing the blog.  I have edited them a little but just a spelling mistake or two.

The artist is Lea Waters a psychologist, who heads an innovative academic project that I believe will ultimately challenge the way we view education systems.  Her knowledge about human behaviour, both scientific and sensitive is vast, and she is mum with two kids that finds time to paint. 

Lea was a reflexology client of mine in Australia, one that factored highly in the difficult decision process of leaving everything I had established behind.  I met Lea during her 'sabattical year'. A year off, from her work commitments, to focus on her health and set a new direction for her life, and she decided reflexology would be a part of that healing and discovery process.  One of the most miraculous qualities about Reflexology is the exchange that can happen between the receiver and the giver.  Lea was one of my rare clients that essentially make me work a little bit harder, but only so I would feel like I had given her more, or at least as much, as she had provided me during the sessions. 

Lea Waters 08 September at 10:45
hey sweety, for some reason the painting I just posted up on fb makes me think of you????? I'll put some thought into why that is......

Artist: Lea Waters - I call it Lea's Desert but maybe I should call it My Desert!
Ida Chiavaro 09 September at 12:39
I would love to know your thoughts...

It has been very thought provoking for me, which I love :)

On one hand I feel like I'm in that house, both trapped and hiding in a land that has very little to offer - a psychic warned me before I left, that the 3 and 6 months mark would be challenging and last week (3 month mark) some fears about never finding my niche here reared their ugly heads.

I am still very happy here with Søren. I don't want to be anywhere else, well maybe at times I do, but I want to be with him wherever that is :) but as I settle more into my relationship I am thinking more about my own needs, my own goals (or the fact that I have never really had any!!!)

On the other hand, I see the warmth and grounding energy of the  deserts earth and the ingenuity and simplicity of shelter and power (windmill) and the opportunity to focus, that a world with few distractions can provide more easily, and the big clear sky that connects all the worlds together.

As simple as it is, I feel as though I am living a luxurious lifestyle at the moment. I have met other foreigners including a refugee from Sri Lanka and a couple of Thai brides in my language classes, this picture makes me think about pioneering women. It makes me think of home too, which even though Ive never lived in the Australian outback, it feels like home to me :)

I often think of your 'sabatical' year and how that culminated in your new years revelations and I wonder if a 'light bulb' moment will set me off in the right direction. I worry about not finding myself here and needing to leave 'my desert shack', that being a foreigner is just too hard an obstacle to overcome, and the devastating effect that would have on my blissful relationship, but I also doubt I would feel any different if I was living on familiar turf. It's a sense of 'not belonging' that has always been a part of who I am.

Writing to you now is stirring up some inspiration, even if it is just to start writing a blog about my experiences...the idea of writing has been gnawing away at me for a while now. Even just about simple things like needing to hem a skirt and wanting to ring my mum for some sewing lessons, before realising that she lived for 15 years as an immigrant with no support network and no way of communicating with her family except by mail... that it took 3 weeks for her to find out her father died and she had so little money that sewing clothes for her 3 children was her only option... :)

Yes your picture has definitely been thought provoking and perhaps just that you mentioned to me that you think of me when you look at it is all that I need to know :)

I hope you are well.

Thanks so much it has been a pleasure sharing my thoughts with you.

Big hugs


Lea Waters 12 September at 11:42
Wow, you write beautifully Ida. You should certainly start a blog - it will benefit both yourself and others. I wasn't sure why the painting made me think of you but I realise now, after reading your thoughts, that the painting was meant to help act as a trigger for you to put voice to all your feelings right now (at the 3 month mark). You've clearly been doing a lot of reflecting on your life and the lives of those you love, like your mum. I relate to that sense of not belonging and I think that this is a common experience for people who are further along the spiritual journey than most.....we've chosen to be here on earth and yet we know deep down that there is a higher place where we belong. The ultimate truth is that you are eternal and it doesn't matter where you are, you are always HOME.

Lots of love,


Ida Chiavaro 12 September at 14:10
Dearest Lea,
Your message made me smile from deep inside ... and it seems the catalyst that removed the 'veil of the 3 month mark'! :)

Now some research on Blogs and perhaps how to make money from them is my mission for today... and more frustratingly and I'm sure the reason for me stalling this long is what to call it?

Pieces of Home perhaps?

....Reflections from home or Reflex Reaction - oddly enough my first reflexology pamphlet had that name :)

I love your work Lea you are the Master Inspirer, I hope you are achieving maximum fulfillment and success with your missions and goals right.

As usual a pleasure talking and thinking about you

Lots of Love to you too


Lea Waters 13 September at 13:04
So nice to know you are smiling on the inside again. Can't wait to read your blog. All the options you've suggested for a title are good.

I'm flattered to be known as a master inspirer.

My life is good - lots of interesting 'external opportunities' have arisen this year and I am sure it is b/c I took the year off last year and did some necessary inner work. All the opportunities involve me pursuing my career in a way that has a high degree of social value and has a wide social reach. My challenge is to not take on too much!!!!

I am getting better at checking in with myself.

Lots of love,


Ida Chiavaro 18 September at 14:42
Lea can I use the dessert picture in my blog and would you mind if I used some of the dialogue in these messages above for one of my posts. I am happy to keep you completely anonymous or if you prefer set up links to your course or other artwork (if i can work out how to!!! I have started experimenting with a blog at


After spending several hours ( I have a lot of time to spare!) I figured I should just start somewhere, so went back to an attempt I made months ago at googles blogspot, but I think there are better sites available.
Realising upon reflection, that I had a sign or message of things to come but only understand what it all means once I get there...

Lea Waters 19 September at 02:16
Go for it girlfriend :-)

I don't need anonymity.


Well there it is. 

Truth is, the blog idea was inspired because while I was writing my response I deleted twice as much as what I finally wrote. I didn't want the message to be too long, and knowing how busy Lea is I considered she might not have the time to read it all.  

A blog is perfect this way I can write it all down and if someone has the time and is interested they can read away... and maybe smile too.

Best wishes 

18 September 2010

Blog description too long - so now it's my second blog

My first blog post pretty much describes why I was first inspired to start this blog. Now I choose to continue it after a reflexology client, and now dear friend of mine created a water painting of a dessert landscape with a single house and windmill on it. She messaged me to say it reminded her of me. This caused a reflex reaction, a term I was once going to use as my reflexology business name. The message provided me with a chance to reflect on what her thoughts might mean, what could I learn from from that dessert scene?
My next post will contain some of the thoughts and dialogue from that original message. While I'm not about to promise to write every day I will make an effort to write more often, about my reactions to the world around me. I imagine it will cover topics about my relationships with other people and myself, immigration and being an expat, life in Australia and now Denmark, health and healing, Alzheimer's (especially if my mother is diagnosed with it next week), food glorious food, and probably music and love, that just about covers everything! I have been told so many times I write well and that it would be healing for myself and others, which has always been a central theme in my life.
I know the popular belief is to dream your dream and make it happen but this has never worked for me, I talk myself out of everything and lose interest quickly, yet I have travelled the world and been privy to so many experiences, completely unplanned.  

I tend to live my life more in retrospect. Realising upon reflection, that I had a sign or message of things to come but only understand what it all means once I get there...now the message is to write, so hopefully my future blogs will be the first steps to where I am meant to be next. 

Until recently a sense of belonging has always eluded me, but things have changed and for now, as long as I can eat a variety of delicious food, spend time with my loved ones and dance occasionaly, I will always feel at home.
I was going to make the previous paragraphs my blog description but apparently that is restricted to 500 characters.

Best wishes